Okay, so teachers all strive to assist children in achieving those lightbulb moments, wanting to hear the little cries of discovery and realisation of a concept or skill. However, getting there is generally a journey of constant repetition, hair pulling (of the teachers, not the kids!) and often downright hilarity!
I hadn’t intended on this being my blog post today but yesterday a child delivered an utterly fabulous one liner (actually one ‘worder’) in a response to a question, that I felt it needed sharing. Let’s face it, children say the weirdest / funniest / most random of things, that to them probably seem completely plausible based on their short experience of the world. Some ideas are sweet, others slightly misconstrued information. And then there are the ROFL-copter worthy answers that eventually turn your tears of laughter to tears of despair when it dawns on you that you’re the one who’s been educating this child, so clearly you’ve not been doing your job properly!
I’d never want to stomp on their little egos though, so the laughter remains (for the most part) internalised whilst gently correcting the misconceptions. Safely stored in the memory bank however, I can whip them out as an anecdote to amuse the masses, occasionally even using them as a teaching tool.
So here are some of my favourites from the last few years – I’m positive there are many you could share with me too (please do!). Let’s learn to take things a little less seriously and embrace the daftness of childhood – it’s all kinds of amazing!
MATHS:
Q: What do you add to 5 to make 10?
A: Erm…badgers?
(I mean, how am I supposed to respond to that?!)
Q: What’s the bottom number of a fraction called?
A: The determinator!
Angles bigger than 90 degrees Miss? I know that, it’s ABUSE!
ENGLISH:
Dear Mr. Willy Wanka…
R.E:
I know I’m part of a community because I’ve got the book.
(…and the T-shirt?)
HISTORY:
I think slavery means you do a lot of gardening.
In the 1950s, if a boy wanted to ask a girl out, first he would always ask, ‘Can you fix my tractor?’
COMPUTING:
Looking at a picture of Steve Jobs:
That’s my cousin’s uncle!
(Doesn’t that make him your dad??)
GEOGRAPHY:
The effects of not recycling are you will get a disease and it will END YOU!
SOCIAL STUDIES:
A boy, kissing another boy? Huh, whatever next…
(Clearly seven going on seventy!)
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*laughs* That is so funny. What a wonder. I make odd comments all the time, too. It’s fun, I think.
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Absolutely, who wants to be proper and correct at all times and kill the imagination? Still, I get paid to be accurate, otherwise I’d definitely be using giraffes as a standard measuring unit!
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Giraffes?! Oh you wouldn’t!
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I just think, end to end, they would make quite an effective measure for long distances. London to Edinburgh: 1000 giraffes and a hedgehog, as the crow flies.
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*laughing* How can I debate this sort of logic?
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It’s generally best not to question it, it can lead to utter discombobulation!
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I wish you were my teacher, the sudden!
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🙂 I’m sure I’m not fully qualified to educate a professor – though I imagine your behaviour would be easier to handle!
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I would only through tantrums when lunch was late. Promise.
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I can handle that – I do the same thing 🙂
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*laughs* Oh goody.
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loved this – thanks. I think the badgers was my all time favourite for the sheer inexplicableness of it but there were loads of corkers in there. More please soon!
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Haha, it does definitely rank as the most random response I’ve ever had! Thanks for stopping by (and following) 😊
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Haha I love this! The Willy Wanka one made me laugh out loud, thanks for sharing!
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Haha, my pleasure 🙂 That one never fails to amuse me. There’s always one whenever we cover the book, guaranteed!
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This is wonderful, I should really start writing down my daughters one liners. She has some good ones. Thank You for sharing this. Made my day!
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You’re welcome! I always say I should write them down and never get round to it – definitely worth it as something to laugh at when they’re older!!
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I keep an album for all the wonderful blackmail pictures for future boyfriends or husband (sitting on the toilet, picking her nose, scratching her butt) but kids do say the darndest things, so maybe I’ll start an album for that!
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